June 8, 2008

Chris and I started the day with a bike ride up to Trumbolt. I swear, we were faster today - at least I didn't feel so sluggish, but the clock does not lie. We will try to beat our time next ride.

Got a call from mom this morning after our bike ride. Dad is sick. Spiked a fever last night and was admitted to the Huntsman 4th floor. U of U's bone marrow transplant floor was full, so they were sent to Huntsman instead. He is getting IV antibiotics and fluids. He was very dehydrated and felt completely horrible. They have drawn cultures - we should know in a couple of days what they show. Otherwise, his CXR looked fine, no pneumonia. CBC looked okay. He is just so sick. Mom is so worried. I hate not being there, not able to do anything from here but wait and worry. They say that 80% will end up in the hospital with an infection at some point after starting chemo. As far as the chemo goes, he finished the first round of his 4-day infusion of Depace on Friday. Dad told me yesterday on the phone (before he started feeling sick) that he had noticed the ridge of his sternum tumor receding. It is amazing that in such a short period of time the tumor is already being affected. The plan was to have his Neulasta shot (growth hormone to stimulate stem cells) today, Sunday. Since he is sick now, they still gave the "go ahead" for the Neulasta and he had it this afternoon. Mom said that it is a bugger of a shot; the side effects are very painful. I guess the bones feel very challenged and the body feels like it is trying to squeeze out any good stuff from the bones that it can. Very painful. It does my heart some good to know that he is there at the hospital and will be given any meds, pain meds or regular meds, through his Port-A-cath and be comfortable, not in pain. Mom was planning to go back to the condo tonight to sleep. She has been up all night, up all day. Bless her heart.

June 6, 2008

I got a sad call from Kate last night. Her husband, Eldon, lost his dad on June 3rd. He had cancer and it had recently come back. The funeral was this morning and I was able to attend. It was a lovely service. I saw some people that I hadn't seen for awhile, including Kate's parents and sister, as well as the rest of Eldon's family. It was a very nice tribute to his father. There were tears, but the speakers truly brought the spirit of friendship and love into their talks, focusing on the many hats that he wore, the funny things he did, and the love that he had for his children and grandchildren. I am so glad I was able to go!

School's out!

June 4, 2008

School was let out last week, May 28. The kids are official bums now. I am going to do my best to keep them busy, busy, busy this summer!! So far, Lauren is still in bed this morning (it is 9:48) and I have "calmly and respectfully" asked her to get out of bed already TWICE. Looks like Drill Sargent Brenda needs to visit, hmmm?? A bunk party sounds to be the perfect maneuver here (dump mattress, pull sheets, empty drawers, etc.)

Trevor came up to me the other day and said "Mom, Gus is making love to the blanket!" I laughed to myself at the notion that he said "making love" (like he even has a clue what that means!). Trevor, seeing my "yeah right" look on my face then demonstrated exactly what Gus was doing to the blanket. He started swiveling his hips and said "This was what Gus was doing!" Holy crap! So...yeah. He WAS right (definitely not the imagery I want my kids seeing). My cat is fixed...apparently he is horny. I have asked Jamie, the animal guru, about this odd display and she said it was normal. Well, I hope it is a short phase as he was doing the same thing to Lauren's most favorite bathrobe today! I, not wanting to disturb him out of respect (I can't believe I said that!), said to Lauren, "Gus is pawing at your bathrobe, just so you know." She said "Ewwwee! Now I have to wash it again!" Apparently, this has happened before (Ick). So, I have to think of how I can use this as a teaching moment for the kids, as it is becoming the big joke of the family. I have my ideas. This is going to be a fun summer.

Dad gets his Port-A-Cath

Yesterday, June 3, 2008, was a momentous day as my dad started his first round of chemo. It is called D-PACE. It is a mixture of highly toxic stuff that is contained in a backpack, which he wears; it continuously pumps chemo for 24 hours, then they return to the Hunstman for a refill x4 days, x4 infusions. They said if it spilled in their condo room, HAZMET would have to come in for cleanup. Yikes! Dad is doing well, not feeling any different. They said it would be 2-3 days before side effects would be felt. He and mom traveled up to SLC on Monday and he had his Port-A-Cath implanted. He was woozy and sick to his stomach afterwards, coming off the meds from his implantation. Amy and I drove up to drop off a bunch of totes that mom had packed, food, cleaning supplies, etc., so we were able to check out their new place! We cleaned, wiped down surfaces with clorox, and helped mom put things away in the kitchen. It is a very cozy place! Two big windows - one views the pool and pretty patio. Mom said the sunrise Tues. morning was beautiful. Dad was feeling much better later that night before Amy and I left, and we all shared a brownie together. He even was feeling up to having one of his favorite cookies, the grassshopper cookie. We had some good laughs, took some pictures (yes...I will post!), and then we headed on our way.

Blaine and Kay's 40th Wedding Anniversay

May 31, 2008

Today was mom and dad's 40th anniversary. We were so lucky to be able to spend it with them! Insurance had stalled on dad's chemo admit last week, so we took advantage of it and had a great party for them. We had a wonderful shiskabob (sp?) BBQ with chicken, steak, veges, watermelon, corn on the cob; the works! It was good food, good fun, great company. We gathered after dinner and gave presents to mom and dad. Also, each daughter had written a letter to mom and dad. Jana and I chickened out on reading ours on our own, so dad stepped in and read them aloud. Amy, who had a 5 page written letter, read hers aloud. It was so funny and heartwarming...I was really touched by it. Later (the skeeters were biting!) we went inside and had some delicious chocolate cake and ice cream. It was such a great time! Thank you mom and dad for being such a great example of love, honor, and respect to each other. I love you very much!!

We had such a great night together. Thank you for the memories!!

Madison graduates from Kindergarten

The kids had a water party the day before graduation, May 26th. It was tons of fun and the weather was perfect!

The next day, May 27th, was graduation. There were 2 morning and 1 full-day Kindergarten classes. These kids are so cute and smart! I can't believe that this year is finally to a close. Madison was awarded the "Queen of Narnia" award, which is an award for the outstanding student who holds true the virtues of responsibility, accountability, and respect. We are so proud of Madison!! The "King of Narnia" for her class was Lake Williams, who is the son of Rhonda (Allred) Williams, a fellow friend and coworker from my days at Dr. Clarks' office. How cool is that??? We are so proud of you, Madison.

Sand Dunes

We spent Sunday at the Sand Dunes with Afton, Matt, and kiddos galore. The weather was absolutely perfect! Really by far the warmest day this year. Madi and Ellie rode round and round on Ellie's pink little 4-wheeler. The others rode to their hearts content on the bigger toys. Chris, once again, had me squealing and hanging onto dear life as we rode across the giant waves of sand. Will I ever NOT be afraid of steep hills? Gadfrey! Best of all, time was spent with Afton and holding sweet, tiny, darlin' Shelby. What a doll! She pooped on me though....so I guess I have some good blackmail to use on her in the future. :) HA!

Dad's diagnosis

My doorbell rang a little while ago...I thought it was those pesky deacons going door-to-door. :) Me in my jammies and messy hair, I debated on answering it or not. Chris and Brandon had gone fishing, Lauren and Trevor were at Jana's house for a sleepover. Basically it was me and Madi, so I had no helpers to save me from the embarrassment of answering the door in my scary appearance. I reluctantly answered it...and standing there was my dad. Behind him was his mountain bike. I gasped...literally...and then hugged him. It has been a long week for him...for us. To see that he had rode his bike from Payson to Santaquin, I was pleasantly surprised, especially knowing the issues and emotions he had been dealing with over the past few weeks. To see him as happy as he was at his accomplishment was wonderful! At that point, he whipped out my mom's cell phone and clumsily (Yep, dad has used a cell phone about 3 times in his lifetime) dials home to let mom know he had arrived and is just fine.

Our news came late afternoon on April 1: Multiple myeloma, stage II. The oncologist said he wanted my dad to start chemo right away, not the radiation they had previously talked about. The cancer was found in the bones that produce marrow - sternum, both upper arms, hips, and both femurs with the left showing 'moth eaten' areas where the bone had deteriorated (he's been limping on it lately). The chemo treatment is a drug cocktail called TZD - Thalidomide (a med that was banned in the 60's after pregnant women using it delivered babies without arms/legs), Zometa ('bone juice' which infuses bones to make them stronger), and Dexamethasone (a high-dose steroid). The cost for the meds is astronomical - my only guess is as a result of lawsuit settlements for the families that were affected by Thalidomide. The initial $ estimate for his monthly meds was quite high and devastated my dad, thinking the cost (even with insurance) would eat up all their savings, leaving my mom with nothing to live on after he had passed. It was painful to see my dad so broken up...all he could think about was mom and she being okay financially, not even worrying about what he was up against. Mom was just the opposite and, in tears, saying she would spend any amount to keep him well and by her side. My dad's mood was somber. Every time he thought about it, he would get choked up. On Thursday, we received a call from the oncologist's office - incredible news!! - DMBA (BYU's insurance) is practically paying for everything and his co pay will be peanuts compared to what they originally estimated. A complete shock - yes - and the best news for my dad to hear. Now he can concentrate on chemo without worrying about the cost. I can't tell you how wonderful it feels to see him toss that burden aside, a burden that only he felt he should carry. I just can't tell you...

So to see him ride out to my house, a change has taken place, a good change. He really needed to hear that good news. It seems like things are falling into place now: He was able to get his spring semester taken care of with plans to teach this fall, retiring in January. He has a consultation on Monday/surgery on Tues. to repair the hernia he developed while trying to stifle his chest pain that initially landed him in the hospital last month (oh that makes me heartsick!). His chemo meds are being shipped from Fort Knox (joking) and he basically has to take a pregnancy test every month to keep getting them (not joking). The treatment is affordable and the best out there for multiple myeloma.
Some bad news, but a lot of good news as well.
Hold your loved ones closer...tighter.
Love to all, Brenda

Some sad news...

My dear, sweet dad was admitted to MVH last week with severe pain in his sternum, so severe that he could not catch his breath. They did a chest x-ray whiched showed the sternum to be suspicious looking. A CAT scan was ordered and revealed a 2-inch tumor on his sternum. He was admitted for pain control and further testing was ordered. The doc's did a bone scan on Monday afternoon that showed the tumor to be primarily localized in his sternum. No other "hot spots" were identified, which was actually the best news we could ask for. A biopsy was performed on Tuesday and the diagnosis at this point is "monoclonal gammopathy." Unfortunately, we don't know a lot about this, but we do know that it is a precursor to more serious cancers such as multiple myeloma and non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. There are M-proteins in his bone marrow that are over producing/copying themselves at a crazy rate and boxing out the white blood cells, red blood cells, etc. He will be seeing specialists in the next coming weeks, and also hopefully he will have an excisional biopsy of the tumor and what's left of his sternum as the area continues to spasm and cause him a great deal of pain.

We are extremely hopeful and optimistic that this diagnosis was caught in time for treatment and therapy to be curable. This mass in his chest and the pain he was having in his sternum was misdiagnosed 9 months ago as "costrochondritis" (by another doctor - not our family GP), and we are very thankful that it was actually a "burp" (which put a lot of pressure on his already deteriorated sternum) that caused the spasms, difficulty breathing, and ultimately led my mom to taking him to the hospital last Sunday night. Otherwise, I am afraid to think of how long this might have gone on undiagnosed?? Very scary to imagine...

My dad has been so strong and upbeat about this whole thing. I love him with all of my heart and soul! Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers! Love to all, Brenda

2007

OMGosh - I'm a blogger

Okay folks, here is the big test: Let's see if I can get this blog thing to actually work. I have to admit, I am terrified as I am not so savvy when it comes to this sort of thing.

So my sister, Afton, and my bro-in-law's wife, Kaisa, are huge bloggers. I have been in complete awe of their posts and never thought I could attempt such a feat, so I am just going to jump in head first...Here is a little bit about me: I am 32, very soon to be 33. I am married to Chris and we are celebrating our 12th anniversary at the end of this month! We have 4 children - Lauren is 13, Trevor is 10, Brandon is 7, and our caboose, Madison, is 6. We live in Santaquin, just down the road from where Chris and Steve originally grew up. Chris works at Neways as the production manager and I work at home for IHC. As soon as it is warm enough, we head to the mountains for hiking, mountain biking, BBQ'ing, and Chris' all time favorite - hunting. We recently made the purchase of a very old camper, so I am very excited to break that baby in and get her up in the mountains!

My favorite sport is volleyball. I have been fortunate enough to play with close family and friends on the women's league in Payson for the past 9 or 10 years Our original team consisted of: Vona Judd, Jennifer VanAusdal, Afton Lovell, Lori Lee, Merilee Judd, and Synthia Meredith - good times and good friends. These ladies are a mixture of family, plus wives of the guys I hung out with in high school. We really bonded and I felt like it was a crucial part of our circle of friends from high school staying close together. I finally took a break from volleyball 2 years ago after having knee surgery, but when Vona called me again this fall to see if I would play, I jumped at the opportunity, saying to myself "what the hell...you're only young once!"

I love my family dearly. They mean the world to me. My sister Afton moved to Logan when she got remarried last year. It has been so hard not having her and the kids 5 minutes away for a visit. The blog has been great to keep up with everything that they are doing...I just click and there I am...right along with them, having fun. Blogs are great. I don't know why I was so against them before?

So...here are my happy, sappy, closing words: Do what truly brings you happiness and live life to the fullest. Be adventurous, silly, laugh, and learn, with no regrets. I want to surround myself with you, my friends, and my family...the people who truly bring me happiness.

Love to all who read this...Brenda